An Open Letter to my Hometown
May 31, 2016
I cannot bring myself to understand them; their words are a foreign language. “I can’t wait to leave.” “Nothing EVER happens here.” “I’m going to leave and never come back.” These words bitterly echo through the air, bouncing through the school hallways. What have you ever done to them? Why do they feel this way? Why do I not feel the same? I’ll be wistfully leaving you in a few months, supposedly following the yellow brick road to my promised land, with my boxes, books, and cold feet.
I can picture my departure. It will look a movie scene, with a hopeful sounding acoustic guitar playing in the background, as a girl stares out a car window. The focus will fade between the reflections of passing leafy trees and her tear-stained face, as she tries to be hopeful about what is to come. I know that it’s time to move on, but for me, it’s no small feat to accept that. I feel as if I am sitting in the cockpit of Apollo 11’s capsule as the countdown passes T-10 seconds, absolutely terrified with a hint of exhilaration.
You cannot even begin to imagine how much I will miss you, or be able to count the reasons why. I’ll miss my long walks on your beaches during the autumn, winter, spring—and I’ll even miss my frustration with the influx of unfamiliar inhabitants crowding all of my paths, whether on the beach or in the grocery store, during “the season.” I’ll miss speeding down your Million Dollar Mile, my dangerous encounters in the Coffee’s Country Market Parking lot warzone, and finding my schoolteachers at the Old Lyme Inn at 7pm sharp for Trivia Tuesdays. I’ll even miss getting stuck behind the Mass Lady, Mr. Tibbs, and your many Subarus that are cluttered with Obama 2012 and “No Farms No Food” bumper stickers, all of which have a habit of traveling 6 miles per hour under your already slow speed limits. Maybe while I’m gone, you can change McCurdy Road’s speed limit to at least 35 mph, on the stretch past the Country Club, because 25 mph is just too slow—ask anyone.
Eventually, I’ll have to learn to lock my car in my own driveway, take my purse and keys out of the ignition, and then proceed to open my new home’s locked door and remember to lock it behind me. I’ll have to memorize new roads, routes, highways, and overwrite exit 70 and 71’s significance in my mind.
You’re a riddle. I’ll leave with so many unanswered questions. Why do the Nativity figurines from the 1960s still occupy my neighbors yard after Valentine’s Day? Why is it “the buzz” of the town when a non-white family moves in? Why is it a sin to be apathetic to both the Red Sox and Yankees? What do they even sell at the E.F. Watermelon? —Because I am under the impression that it isn’t watermelons. Why is Halls Road probably the only street in America where you can get off the highway, rob 4 banks, and get right back on the highway?
What baffles me the most is that local statistics show that your “haters” today will most likely be the first people to try to buy a home on your land, in the future. They’ll find out that they miss your 28.2 square miles, breathtaking #OLsunsets, Vecchito’s Italian Ice, people lacking in “street smarts,” and Pumpkin, the Alpaca, at the Christmas Eve Service at the Congregational Church. They will want to take their kids to the Memorial Day Parade in the spring, to the Midsummer Festival in the summer, to see the fiery foliage in autumn, and to the golf course to go sledding in the winter. They’ll learn that you are one of the most hidden gems of the world, a paradise, and they will come crawling back.
Old Lyme, you will always hold such a special place in my heart. I have such deep roots in your soil. While I will be leaving, the ticket will never be one-way. I’ll always return. Always. You are part of who I am and I know that no matter how hard life may get, you will have my back. You are beautiful and unforgettable. Don’t let the frustrated BMW driving high-schoolers, who don’t realize how wonderful they have it, tell you anything less.
Martha Roberts Hester • Jun 7, 2016 at 5:05 pm
We had a darling house off one of the trails in Rogers Lake. I often wish for that time again. It was an awesome place. Unfortunately we left in 1975 to make a military move. I now live in Clarksville, Tennessee, and sure miss Connecticut and my little house!
Cherie Bredbury • Jun 3, 2016 at 6:33 am
So well written, you capture the essence of your town. May you always be so thankful of the things the good Lord has provided you with. Soar with eagle wings when you leave and allow the Lord to Direct your steps.
ryan • Jun 2, 2016 at 9:07 pm
I grew up in Westbrook. Moved to Boston. After bouncing around upon my return to CT I settled down in Old Lyme. I too felt the hunger to get out of a small town and experience life, big cities, other countries and cultures, other people, to live, start over, make new friends, travel. I did it all. And 20 years after I left Westbrook I sought the same environment I left to raise my family. Westbrook grew and changed and I am now here in Old Lyme. I love it. It’s quiet quaint, close knit, and I hope that the beauty and charm I had growing up in a small town with close friends and tight community is something my kids will experience on their journey towards their own exodus toward their own freedom and life defining experience somewhere else. Small towns are a great place to grow up, especially small beach towns. But they birth the curiosity and desire to get out and see the rest of the world. It’s a great thing. Do it. And some day, you’ll either covet that life once again, or you’ll be happy where you land and look back with fond (or perhaps bad) memories. This is life. Get out there and figure out which person you’ll become. Great article..
Samantha • Jun 2, 2016 at 1:29 am
Old Lyme is fine and all, but its a place to visit, not to live.
Get out and experience the world.
There’s a lot more out there beyond 06371, trust me.
I moved 3 months ago to the west coast and don’t ever intend on going back.
Don’t live your entire life in one zip code.
Kelly Leese (Shaw) • Jun 1, 2016 at 11:11 pm
Perfectly written!!!
I left in 1996 and not a day goes by I don’t miss it!! I was fortunate to return for a week last summer, and oh how I did not want to leave!!
Old Lyme will always be home!!
linda • Jun 1, 2016 at 10:30 pm
“boxes, books and cold feet” love it! Good job.
Jayme • Jun 1, 2016 at 8:36 pm
Great article, Allie! I grew up in OL, moved away for several years and have since moved back to buy a home and raise start a family here. Old Lyme will always be my forever home. ❤️
CTravel31 • Jun 1, 2016 at 6:46 pm
Alternate view point coming, warning given: The best thing that ever happened to me was leaving in 2003 after graduating. I have spent very little time in the town in the 13 years since, spending the majority of my time in a few areas of Maine, Maryland/Washington DC, China and Colombia with occasional short holiday trips home, but that is it. These past 13 years trotting around the globe have exposed me to way more than I ever could have seen in even a life time in this small town and for sure a heck of a lot more than my first 18 years there. While I am happy that others enjoyed the town, I will not wear rose colored glasses or look back on my experience with much nostalgia. While I harbor no ill-will at this point, if pressed to remember my time, via articles like this, it was not so pleasant and some kids were downright nasty and cruel. The local high school did little to foster acceptance and tolerance during my four years there and did not do nearly enough to deter bullying. Excellent teachers were forced out of classrooms crying due to mean students and the school even lost a native Spanish speaker due to the accusations of some awful girls a few grades below me. It was not a positive learning environment. I hope for the sake of some of the kids I graduated with that they have matured A LOT because if they act even close to how they behaved back than, it will be a very tough life for them. It was kind of a lack of self awareness coupled with the ability to pick out the smallest little detail and make it into something almost insurmountable. On the positive, the long walks on the beach during winter could not be beat and biking through the woods or swimming at one of the many amazing areas in the town was incredible. I am a better person for leaving the town and perhaps, since it is so small, I can someday bring back my global perspective to allow others in the town to see the town and more importantly the world, in a different, more positive light.
Jim Luce • Jun 1, 2016 at 5:08 pm
Thank you Allie Marsh for expressing your affinity for Old Lyme. I graduated from Old Lyme in 1975 and moved to New Jersey in 1982, where my wife and I raised our four children. But like you , I could always feel Old Lyme in my soul. The walks along Griswold Point, swimming at White Sands beach, fishing in the Lieutenant River and the smell of the marsh were memories that were strongly embedded in me. I hoped that someday I would return. In 2013 we bought a home along the shoreline allowing me to once again spend time in Old Lyme. When we travel up to the Connecticut shoreline from New Jersey on Friday afternoon, I am always feeling great knowing I’ll soon be on the Connecticut river or walking along Griswold Point. I’m already in an “Old Lyme state of mind.”
david dixon • Jun 1, 2016 at 1:17 pm
Much of your story can be explained as basically the difference between the thoughts of those graduating high school versus 16 anyone greater then say 30 years of age. After a certain time and maturity, the high school/college graduating crowd will look back and start to realize that while there are certainly a few con’s associated with living in the Lyme/Old Lyme area, there are also more than a few Pro’s as well. At the age not too far beyond puberty thoughts about safety, peace of mind and quiet living are not high on their list of priorities. < : ) Certainly, our three kids have opinions that have changed over the years and I believe many of them paralleling the thoughts expressed above.
Lynn Harris Ewen • Jun 1, 2016 at 12:24 pm
My grandchildren are 5th generation to swim in Rogers Lake, Sandy Beach in Old Lyme/Lyme , Ct. My parents had a summer home that we would spend the summers in. Great memories of all the fun we had. Even after I started work in the fall of ’66 I would go up after work durning the summer. My Grandparents had a cottage across the street from our house. That’s where my father and his family stayed durning the summer. When my grandparents passed they left the cottage to my father. That’s where I spend my summers with my children . My husband would come up on Wed. Night and every weekend . My children had the best place to enjoy their summer vacation Now I bring my grandchildren . It will never get old swimming in the lake. Can’t wait to jump in this summer. A small town with so much to offer. ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
Christine A Rodriguez Warren • Jun 1, 2016 at 11:46 am
I was one who said I’d move and never be back.
My parents are gone now, house will be put on the market soon.
I don’t miss it except the screened in porch, the quiet afternoons. Sundays after 4 pm in summer when you cannot have a conversation on the North side of the house due to the motorcycles in prosessetion on 156 below us, and the sirens headed to the inevitable accident on over crowded roads. The August tradition of the Hamburg Grange Fair, and the Chester fair a week later. Driving through Lyme and moo-ing at the beautiful “girls” on Tiffany Farm. Stopping at Hallmarks, sadly an AC Peterson now. The sea salted air you can smell coming down Million Dollar Mile to Blackhall.
(White Sands, Hartford Ave. with Palmer’s, Viccettos and stopping by Joe Martino’s for a game of cards and his loving hospitality.) My memories…
Ya…the good old days!
Left town 30 years ago.
Kathryn Gionet • Jun 1, 2016 at 10:30 am
Beautifully written and you hit all the marks.
I left in ’73 right after getting married, but my parents were still there for quite sometime afterwards, so I never really left.
All my memories are imbedded there .
Old Lyme will always be a special place.
Daniel • Jun 1, 2016 at 8:44 am
This article is awesome.
Linnea Mesham • Jun 1, 2016 at 7:27 am
What a wonderful tribute to your town and to the people in that town. Keep your memories and please do return. I hope the town does not get any bigger and that they keep all these places the same , that are so close to your heart. I know that the town that I was born in grew into a city but the center still has the beautiful Congregational church and a lovely Green. But the rest of the now city is all different. I hope that Old Lyme stays the way it is now …no railroad traveling through the town and all the favorite places the same. We all leave hour homes when we get to that age but most of us keep in our memories of
our early life. I hope you do.
Nicole Dussere • Jun 1, 2016 at 5:40 am
I left Old Lyme in 2005 and have spent every single day since wishing that I were home.