BREAKING NEWS:

Unfortunately, the LOLHS building itself has decided to resign. There were talks of the building not coming back next year and the school board would be able to hire a new building for the ongoing years over the summer. However, the building decided to leave now instead of wait for the end of the year.

The resignation of the literal high school building will undoubtedly cause some minor disturbances. For the time being, while the school board attempts to contact the portables used during what was the current building’s transition period, you will still be able to continue your educational growth. Nearby school buildings will cover for what is now our former building in one of their free periods.

While it is unclear why the building was not asked to return, the decision to just leave without a planned replacement will likely affect some of our student body. However, Westbrook, Old Saybrook, and East Lyme High School are all up to the task and will receive a pay raise for their extra work. It will be a little turbulent for students in the coming months, you might not know your replacement building as well as the old one and your grades may suffer because of this.

We reached out to our old building for a comment and this is what it had to say:

“Well, I thought I was doing a really good job as your building. I was structurally safe, my design was simple but not unflattering, and I was able to comfortably fit everyone. I’m really not sure why the school board was planning on not asking me back. I mean, I get that I can sometimes be too hot or too cold and never just right, but I’m still learning. I thought we established that with the perforated blinds. I make mistakes just like all of you.”

Unfortunately, the old building was unable to provide any answers to subsequent questions as it was too busy weeping into a tub of Ben & Jerry’s while watching Dead Poets Society.

Will you be affected by this unexpected resignation?